Friday, Oct 24, 2014
Joyce Minor

Searching for answers


Published:

Life is full of unanswerable questions, and all of us have our own list. Mine includes: Why do my grandchildren have to live so far away? Why am I always cold even when everyone else is hot? And, of course, Why did I get cancer?

Sometimes I tire of the same unsolvable queries filling my head and ruining my peace of mind, so today I decided there must be other unanswerables to ponder and decided to find them. With some research, plus suggestions from family and friends, I came up with a slew of them.

So, if you're tired of your list, or just have time to kill, consider these:

?Can a dumb person be a smart alek?

?Can fat people go skinny dipping?

?Is it possible to be a closet claustrophobic?

?Do vegetarians have to give up animal crackers?

?Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift?

?Why do kamikaze pilots wear crash helmets?

?Does a shepherd fall asleep when he counts his sheep?

?Can a pig pull a ham string?

?Why do people say "heads up" when they mean duck?

?Why does Superman wear his briefs on the outside of his tights?

?Why would Superman bother leaping over tall buildings if he can fly?

?If the universe is expanding, what is it expanding into?

?Why do we say "bye bye" but not "hi hi"?

?Why do you say "head over heels" when your head is always over your heels?

?What is the opposite of "out of whack"? In whack?

?How did the Headless Horseman see where he was going?

?What is a male lady bug called?

?If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?

?What do you call a female daddy long legs?

?What is French kissing called in France?

?If the professor on Gilligan's Island could make a radio out of a coconut, why couldn't he fix the hole in their boat?

?Is the fear of flying groundless?

?If love is blind, how can there be love at first sight?

?If you try to fail and succeed, which did you actually do?

?If Goofy and Pluto are both dogs, why does Goofy stand upright while Pluto stays on all fours?

?Why does the sun make your skin darker but your hair lighter?

?Why do hot dogs come in packs of eight but hot dog buns in packs of ten?

?Why are pennies bigger than dimes?

?Why is there Braille on the drive-up ATM keys?

?Is a sleeping bag the same as a nap sack?

?Why do you click on Start to stop Windows?

?If Pringles are "so good, once you pop you can't stop," why do they come with a resealable lid?

?If there's an exception to every rule, what is the exception to this one?

?Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

?Why do we make cars that go 120 mph when there are no roads with speed limits above 70?

?Why do we leave expensive cars in the driveway and keep worthless junk in the garage?

?What would happen if an irresistible force actually met an immovable object?

?Why do banks leave the doors wide open but chain the pens to the table?

?Why is the person who handles your money called a "broker"?

And my favorite:

?How can the White House still claim they actually thought Obamacare was ready for prime time?

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